Sunday Salutations and The Wood Wall

Good Morning and Sunday Salutations to all.
Yesterday was a busy day for me.  Busy is good for me right now.
I started the day with a wood cutting expedition with a friend of mine, Mike.
Mike met me at a nice woodlot that belongs to his family.  You may remember Mike from a Christmas tree gathering expedition from two years ago.  Here is Mike!
It is nice to have friends that just like to be there and to help and expect nothing in return.
He had already fell a nice big ash and we promptly cut it up and loaded it into my pick up.
I believe we were a few logs away from the proverbial straw that broke the camels back.

My other friend Jerry met us out there to say hi as he lives right around the corner.  He also dropped off a plow for the back of the garden tractor.  I needed to turn my garden over before the ground froze.
It was nice to see Jerry.  I don't get to see him much anymore.
So I took the wood home and pulled the splitter out of the shed and began the long arduous task of splitting.
Rain was in the forecast so I simply split the wood and piled it up on the garage floor.

After that I removed the snow blower from the tractor and hooked up the plow

Then I played in the garden

I will add 5-6 yards of good topsoil and till it in come spring.

Finally after plowing I mad some nice big, juicy burgers on the grill.  As soon as I put the burgers on it began to rain so my timing was impeccable (lucky)

After dinner I stacked wood. There was more than I thought.  Which is ok by me but man oh man what a never ending pile.

There is even more piled up to the right that you can't see.  I ran out of reaching room on this wall.  I would estimate the wood added up to about 2..25 face cord.

A couple more loads like that and I'll be set until the weather warms again.

Today its raining and yucky.  I need to grocery shop and do laundry.  Momma is on bed rest so lets hope all the laundry doesn't turn pink!

I am hoping for a visit from my little brother.  He stopped by on Thanksgiving but we were at the hospital.  he has to leave to return to Illinois soon and I hope I can see him before he goes.

Have a great Sunday and I'll see you back here soon!
Damn wood splinters anyways,
-Bushman

Exhast Fumes.....sometimes worth their weight in gold.

Once again he perches at his desk.  Eying the screen.  Waiting for it to make a move.  It doesn't.  He doesn't.  The cursor blinks.  Blink Blink Blink.
The battle continues and neither breaks.  Something witty today he thinks.  Blink Blink Blink.
Funny is what I need.  Blink Blink Blink.
Fine then sad it is.  Blink Blink Blink.

How about just typing whatever is on your mind.  That seems to do it.  Finally the letters pour across the screen.  Chasing the blinking cursor but never catching it.  It still taunts him and as long as he keeps chasing, then maybe he will find some salvation.  Maybe he will just find misery and resentment.  In the end it's never about the finish it's always about the chase. Blink Blink Blink.
Over the years I have started many stories with every intent on writing a novel.  I've even backed them off into short stories.  They never mature, laying on these stark white pages, dying or perhaps just resting until one day they may start to chase again.  Nevertheless they never come to fruition.
I was out blowing leaves yesterday. Keeping my mind occupied as well as my liver with an occasional trip to the beer cooler.  I kept getting this feeling like I needed to just sit and write- for a long time.  I pictured myself at a comfortable wooden desk with a thick scarred top.  The light in the room was barely shining and a fire crackled in the fireplace behind me.  Two dogs lay at my feet and I could feel one twitching in his sleep and hear the other emitting small snores.  Nothing much adorned the desk but a small monitor, a cup full of pens and pencils with no tips on them and not a sharpener to be found anywhere.  There were some books laying about, the titles I could not tell you, I assume reference material.  Perhaps a manual to a hide-a-bed couch from 1982.  All I know is that I was there and I was chasing that damn cursor so fast that I may have even caught it had the cursed blower not run out of fuel.
Then out of nowhere an idea struck me for a new book.  The title even came to me as well as little bits and pieces of the story.  I suppose you can call it whatever you want but I will just call it luck.  I think of all kinds of crap to write about and most of it is just that....Crap.  This one however has got me excited.  I may have just found a small piece of salvation. (misery)

Go blow your own leaves!
-Bushman

The Blacks and Blues Always Win!

There is a beautiful sunrise happening just outside my window.  It's an older window and has the slightest bit of condensation clinging to its edges.  The wood encasement is tinged dark with the introduction of moisture.  The brass clasp on top, although mighty and shiny in its former glory, holds a diminished hue and rightfully appears to belong in an antique shop.  

The colors are splendid if only brief in their moment of fame.  Reds and yellows framed by the black night on the sides and the promise of blue on the top.  As quickly as the beauty arrives it departs.  Blacks and grays and violet now rule the skies.  It seems as though the sun has had a quick battle with the sky and now on the losing side is showing its bruises.
I watch this and realize it is about me.  A metaphor.  A giant shining ball of brilliant colors and it all seems so right.  On top of the world, expectations are limitless and you chance at a smile.  Even showing a few teeth and the dimples run deep.  It is a real smile.  A real feeling of happiness.
Then before you know it, before you get the chance to really enjoy the moment it is stolen from you.  Slapping your face with a cold hand over and over until the tears run down your cheeks and stain like the wood in the window.  Your shiny brass lock is restored to it's lackluster hue as you sigh and slump your shoulders.
Once again returning to your state of black, purple and blue.  The bruises will show up in the wrinkles at the corner of your eyes and white strands in your hair.  You cry and it does nothing.  It makes you angry instead of healing.  The blacks and blues.  They always win.

It is for this I am not Thankful.  You can take your Thanksgiving and shove it up your ass.
I'm tired.  I am also sick.  Sick of this horrible game that God calls life.  If there even is a God.  I really just don't think there is anymore.  If you are up there....Fuck You...I want my children back.  All three of them this time you fucking prick!

My Backwards Thanksgiving

I suppose your all wondering what I could possibly post about today.  After all yesterday was my thankfulness list and all that crap.  So I can't possibly post more Thanksgiving garbage can I?
Sure can, but lets twist it up a bit.

Things I am not thankful for:

I am not thankful that there are actually real housewives of Beverly Hills, Atalanta and New Jersey.  Trust me we don't need them.

I am not thankful for kids who have a desperate need to show their underwear to the public and do so in such fashion that it requires one hand to hold them in the correct position while walking.  Is this some mating ritual I missed?

I am not thankful that Law and Oder, NCIS, CSI, Criminal Intent and all the other copy cats are still on TV.  I would like to just once have a conversation with my wife that doesn't involve the DVR.

I am not thankful the UFC deems it necessary to charge such high prices for pay per view when they have one a month and sometimes two.

I am not thankful that I have to choose between filling up my gas tank or buying groceries.  Can we please make an engine that runs on Ramen noodles? 

I am not thankful for heartburn, diarrhea, nausea or the dreaded burning ring of fire.  It messes with my beer drinking.

I am not thankful that Steve Irwin is dead.  No one else thinks it's a good idea to stick your finger in an animals bum.  Science people, strictly science...Crikey!

I am not thankful that the Bob and Tom show on the radio every morning plays the same damn clip about the fat woman eating cookie dough.  Enough already it is giving me subliminal messages and now I have a fridge full of cookie dough.

I am not thankful that my "beard" does not connect with my mustache or sideburns.  It gives the impression that I am dirty.  The other kind of dirty.

I am not thankful that the Detroit Lions teased us the begining of the season and when it came time to put out they called in the menstrual card!

I am not thankful that my little kitty thinks his litter box is a play box after he goes poo.  It's not a toy you moron leave it in the box!

Last but not least I am not thankful that all of you do not come here and read my crap because if you didn't and don't then I won't and I can't.  Re-reading it won't make any sense the second time either.  Leave it be!

Gobble Gobble Bitches!
-Bushman

I am thankful for.......

There's three things in life I really, really like.  One of those is not you so don't get your hopes up.
The first one is beer.  Of course, typical guy.  Think about it though, beer makes you happy or happier depending on what you had for breakfast because you can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning.
It taste good (except for the Great Lakes Brewing Co beer...ackkk!)  It makes you go pee. (Guys love to pee, especially outside or off of balconies or that one time at a Kid Rock concert where I peed off the second level parking garage onto the hood of a GMC Denali on the first level)
Every time you drink one you get 10 cents.  At least in Michigan we have a deposit law.  Granted you already paid the ten cents but after enough beer the accounting seems to get muddled and every sip seems more and more like an investment.  Ta Dah!
It makes cold water warmer, ugly girls pretty and fat girls....well...ummm....friendlier?
You get the point. 
My second favorite thing is food.  For obvious reasons.  I won't go into detail because the first thing ate up way too much space.  Food rocks!
My third favorite thing is everything else(not you I already said not you duhhh).  Well not really.  Now don't get me wrong this is just little personal things.  Of course there is the wife and the family and the dogs but I am just listing my little pieces of treasure.  So my third thing would be.......writing.  I suck at it but if I can make me laugh, or cry, that's all that counts.  I get a kick out of this sport.
Which leads me to the whole damn point of this post...well not really but work with me here I've already had 4 beers and there is 20 cold ones left downstairs in the garage. (I love my garage too)
My list of things I am Thankful for:

I am thankful I can drink my coffee in the morning before I brush my teeth.
I am thankful that I can listen to Wham and still know the words.
I am thankful I can still listen.  (probably not for much longer)
I am thankful my truck is still in the driveway when I wake up in the morning.
I am thankful they finally mad ballroom jeans (though I do not own a pr.)
I am thankful that Whiskey comes in small bottles.
I am thankful that my semi wet sneakers still squeak the hell out of the Walmart floor.
I am thankful that my Set it and Forget has a timer....because I forget it!
I am thankful my friends at work think I'm a dick but still like me...I think!
I am thankful I own a chocolate lab and not a meth lab.
I am thankful that my yellow lab acts like a meth lab.
I am thankful that when I get a hot fire going in the fireplace there is always a fly that appears out of nowhere.
I am thankful I get to squish that fly.
I am thankful for just about anything because in the end it's all I got!
I hope you all have a great Turkey Day tomorrow and remember it's not just about the turkey its about the mashed potatoes and the gravy and the leftover sammiches and the...well........yeah!

On a slow ride to Crazyville

My dog went on Prozac today.  No I'm not kidding.  I figured it was just sitting in the medicine cabinet so I would try it on him rather than let it go to waste.  In case your wondering why I have Prozac around instead of Lithium...well it's a good argument but for the sake of slow typing lets just say we are not depressed in this house.  We are too far beyond that for help.  I had better explain this one or I'll be getting phone calls to see if I'm ok.  (If you read this blog with any regularity most of you will know I am not.) 
Our vet, or should I say his vet prescribed them back when Gunner decided to eat a stick of Shout stain remover, a pair of girl's panties and a lint roller, well endowed with sticky sheets.  He spent two days at the Vets in a constant state of retching and some other noise that sounds like...........Hmmm I don't have that key on this keyboard.  Not good to say the least.  Vet said he had a case of separation anxiety and Prozac would help settle him out a bit. 
I said OK and walked out the door knowing full well the vet was a quack and no way in hell was I putting my dog on Prozac.
So with that said he had his second dose today.  I held off for a long time but in the end it's better for all of us.  I might be able to share it with him as the winter is starting to set in here.  Deer season was pretty much non existent for me.  Normally I would be in the field about 30 days by now and this year I managed 6 so far.  Luckily cars hit deer and I do get lucky from time to time. Hunting that is!
I don't have much of a story to tell lately.  This has been one of the craziest years in my life and I am still trying to process it.  (I'm a bit slow) 
I love the thought of a baby but I have to admit I am just a touch terrified.  I am almost 40 yrs old, just bought a new house and a new truck, one kid out of school and the other a sophomore.  A dog on Prozac and another with such huge nuts I have to photo shop them out of most pictures.  An economy that is killing us at work, a constant battle with the propane tank outside and its incessant need to empty itself while all the time I'm cutting and splitting wood to offset the cost.  Insurance costs going up and wages going down.  Gas, groceries, phone, TV, Internet all so so much higher than before.  It all gets to you and after awhile it steals the creativity and the humor right from your grasp and leaves you staring at the little blinking cursor wondering why nothing will type itself and why you have to sit and think of things that would normally just pour forth.
I sit and do the math and when the baby is 16 I will be 53 yrs old.  21 yrs old and I will be 58.  I will be collecting social security shortly after the college graduation.  It is difficult to grasp and I hope the baby doesn't really care that his folks will be almost fossils when he or she gets married and has a family of his own.  Perhaps it is just my own selfish need.
It all makes me crazy.
Do people just go crazy?  Like you go to bed one night all normal with your normal farts and normal snores but you wake up screaming like a loony and finger painting in poo?
Or does it just sorta happen gradually?  Like me.  I can just watch myself going crazy.  I have this little crazy gauge inside of me and I get up in the morning and the needle has moved just a touch to the right, the full mark.  Or would that be the empty mark?  Yep just a little more crazy today then yesterday.  Yowza bang bang howdy diggity doo ball.  Do you ever blow your nose in a napkin, preferably a blue one, and fold it in half then open it to see what shape you just made?  I do all the time (needle moving again)  Most of the time it looks like a moth but once in awhile it resembles a butterfly which gives me hope.  One time it looked like Godzilla and I was a tad worried.
Can you watch TV with your head sideways?  Like laying on a pillow?  Not me.  Why? .....Just crazy!
It's the little things you might not notice.  When you take a handful of chips out of the bag and put them in a sandwich bag for your lunch does all the little minuscule crumbs on your hand give you the heebie jeebies?  Does me..........Crazy!
So many things too look out for when you think your going crazy.  It sneaks up on you.  You can't fight it. 
So I just figure I'll put the dog on his anti depressants and I'll take Remmi in to get "tutored" and I will sit back and keep an eye on the needle.  You'll be able to tell which days it moves and which days it doesn't.  Just keep reading!
-Bushman

Nuts? Roasting? Open fire? I can't remember the lyrics.

Well Halloween went off without a hitch.  Nobody showed up at our door for candy.  Perhaps living out in the country and the 55 MPH speed limit deters children.  Nonetheless the multi-pack of candy did not go to waste.  I am a sucker for candy bars.
I've been hearing reports that people are missing my blog.  October 15th was my last publish date. 
I won't say sorry because I'm not really.  I'm still sick with this damn cold that bounces from head to chest every other week.  Yesterday marked the three week mark.  I've taken every thing available besides a lead pill to get rid of it.  No luck. 
I have also been busy cutting wood, cleaning leaves, butchering deer and a little thing called work where the overtime seems to be pouring from every blood stained orifice they have.
Why can't we do the overtime thing in the dead of winter when there is nothing else to do?  No, not us, let's do it in the Fall when it's the busiest and best time of the year, for me anyways.
There is also this particular little rat living in our computer room (some say he resembles a kitten) and his bathroom tray is in there and it is kinda stinky (even through my plugged nose) and he also tries to catch the cursor while it moves across the screen as I type.  Everyday I come home from work and look at the computer to see what websites he has been on.  It seems as though the keyboard is a good resting place for little rats.  So I came in here this morning and we had a talk (the rat and I), I dumped the litter (he briskly began to fill it up again) and he agreed to sit calmly in my lap as I type....no....wait a sec...never mind.
Funny how things work out.  After much whining and pleading by other members of this clan I agreed to bring home said rat under the condition that he is to be an outside rat and catch all the little chipmunks living in my shed, garage and woodpile.   The biggest condition is that I would not clean the litter pan.
So with that said momma pulls a fast one on me and says one day, about a week ago, I can no longer change the litter.  Bullshiznit you told me that..........wait a minute.....no way.........way?
Yep were pregnant.  Me with a beer belly and her with a baby.
At 37 years the Old man upstairs has decided to give me one more shot at Fatherhood.  We have been married for almost ten years now.  This is our third pregnancy.  The first two only went 5 months.  Corwin and Isabella were not meant to roam this earth with me but perhaps this one will.
Call it Karma, Fate, Faith or happenstance I don't care but about a week before she told me the news I was driving to work, it was dark, and I saw the biggest shooting star I have ever seen.  It streaked from one end of the sky to the other and it was super bright.  Without a moments hesitation or thought on the matter I wished for a baby.  Not messing around here people that is the truth.  I told people about the shooting star but never about the wish.  They asked but I told them it wouldn't come true if I told them.  Now I can.
We were also recently discussing the idea of surgery for me so we wouldn't have to worry about raising children from a walker or a nursing home.
Just weird how things happen.  I am ecstatic but also anxious and nervous with a bit of sadness thrown in.  We do not know for sure what will happen but we did have some preventative measures put in place after we lost Isabella.  It seems as though they may have figured out why she wasn't able to go full term.  Hopefully we have solved that problem.  One more shooting star and I'll take care of that one too.
The new truck is awesome.  I love driving it.  It makes me happy to be in a truck again.  I have so many neat things picked out for it.
Oh yeah we changed the Christmas song to..."Remmi's nuts roasting by an open fire".
Who the hell is Chet anyways?  Santa's hobo helper?

I suppose that is enough for now.  I will try to post more but this is a busy time of year.
Until next time,
Bushman