If you want to increase your success rate, double your failure rate.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Do I yell at Mice?

Well here I am again.  I was able to sleep in this morning.  It's 6 o clock.  Unfortunatley my internal clock had me awake at 4 as usual.  I just laid in bed for awhile.(That is until my back ached bad enough to drive me from the comfort of the warm sheets).  All is quiet here.  The dogs not being part of the All of course.  I think they get a kick out of picking up their big bone(cow femur) and slamming it down on the hardwood floors.  It's a big house and it echoes.  It's a good thing I'm the only insomniac in the house.  Everyone else would sleep through a car crashing through the front window.  I can't wait for Spring I think I'm going crazy.
I find it odd that up here in the "great " north we exhibit such severe depression when February and March come.  I like to call it the winter doldrums.  It consists of a vast green free wasteland mixed with dirty snowpiles and exhaust plumes from every car.  Salt residue clings to every substance as if trying to remain free from the treacherous grip of the snow.  A single touch of snow on a salt grain and it begins to kill both of them.  Whats left is a winter blood that turns your car grey and your lips chapped.  The temperature dips into the teens at night and into the 30's during the day.  Your heart skips a beat when you step outside and feel the temporary "heat wave" only to realize it will last only an hour before it plunges back down to the Jack Frost realm.  The groundhog has said 6 more weeks of winter.  After all these years of forecasting they still can't understand his language.  What he really says is,  "It's cold you morons and it will be for 2 more months I never said 6 weeks.   Stop putting words in my bucktooth filled mouth and let me get back to my dreams of Jennifer Aniston and I having dinner in Farmer Bushman's not so perfectly fenced in garden".
I suppose our only salvation is knowing that we have to accept it and just wait it out.  The worst thing is all the gardening catalogs are begining to show up.  I just received the new edition of Guerney's seed catalog.  It won't take long and I will be drawing schematics of the garden and how I will plant the corn next to the beans and well I don't need to go any further. 
So what do I do now?  Not sure.  Hopefully very soon I will be so busy that I will wish for what I have now.  Not really,  I love to stay busy.  I'm a project person.  Gotta have something going all the time.  What I really need to do is project all this weight off of my body.  50 lbs of hip aching, knee cracking blubber. 
I think it will take more effort to lose weight than it did to quit smoking or even quit drinking for that matter.
3 years without a cigarette.  Almost 8 months without a beer.  I quit my two main hobbies and now my new one is apparently eating.  I went from killing my lungs and liver to killing my heart.  Holy cow!!!
I suppose I better shape up before I keel over of a heart attack.   Not that it runs in the family or anything.  Bushmans have great heart health.  NOT!!!!  I suppose that can be my new addiction.  6 months from now I will be typing about how aneorexic I am.  I guess I'm just not one for moderation.  It's all or nothing baby!!!!
Well I will leave you alone now.  Stop shaking your head you all know I'm just a wee bit different than your average person.  You like it.  You know it.  I am a built in entertainer of the heart.  I can make you laugh and I can make you cry all in the same conversation.  I'm like a walking version of the tv show Family Guy.  You can't stop watching it even though your shaking your head and saying "That just ain't right". 
By the way Jackie Gleason does yell at mice!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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