Where do we go from here?

So what do you talk about when there is nothing to talk about?
I've put the book on the back burner.  You would think with all of this "free" time I have right now that I would be banging out pages left and right but unfortunately my brain is stuck on this new task at work.  I'm sure it will pass in a few weeks but right now I can't go more than 5 minutes without some thought drifting into my mind.  It's hard to concentrate on anything.  It can wait.  It's been waiting for almost 40 years now another few weeks won't hurt.  Winter is starting to take its toll on me.

I watched an interview with the Dalai Lama this morning.  Apparently he has a twitter account but he isn't the one who uses it.  I laughed because he is comical with his reasonings on why.  His fingers won't work the little machine he said.  The interviewer asked him what was the key to happiness and of course it had to be in tweet fashion of 140 characters or less of which the dalai paid no attention but to paraphrase it he said,

"More compassionate mind, more sense of concern for other's well-being, is source of happiness."
"Self-centered attitudes, he said, are at the root of unhappiness and human suffering."

“Too much self-centered attitude, you see, brings, you isolation,” he said. “Result: loneliness, fear, anger. The extreme self-centered attitude is the source of suffering.”

Words to live by.  The Buddhists live such a simple life.  Pure, violence free and not fat from greed.

The next thing I read this morning was about the greed of the archdiocese in New Jersey.  Building a huge addition to the bishops already monstrous retirement home while they are closing schools because there is no money.  It's OK though because they sold some properties that they owned which were no longer needed and used that money to build this addition which has multiple fireplaces and a whirlpool.

Such contradictory views on life.  It's sad.  We live in such a cruel world.  I have questioned my beliefs all my life.  Being raised to believe in God and Jesus and doing so because that's what you were supposed to do.  I often wonder if it isn't all made up.  Started only to keep people from doing bad things.  The Bible is simply a fictionalized tool to set guidelines for us.  After thousands of years of it being pounded into our heads it stands as the truth.  I'm not saying it is bad because it is about love and caring and kindness as well as a few other things like not killing each other!

I watched a video the other day (I wish I wouldn't have) on FB.  It said watch and share, we are trying to spread this around so the cops can catch this lady who abused this child.  I clicked.

The video was of a lady beating an infant.  The infant was maybe 9 months or so.  She beat it with a pillow, she slapped its face, she pinched the living hell out if its arm.  Kicked it repeatedly.   Just when the poor thing would stop crying she would start again.

I cried a little, I wanted to vomit.  I wanted to kill that lady over and over again.
I thought to myself, "there can not possibly be a God."  "No God would let this happen".
Now what?  What do you do when that crosses your heart.
Makes a person retreat.

Then I see a little ray of hope out of an old man living in the mountains of Tibet who the Chinese would love to see dead.  He says be compassionate and do not be self centered.

The world is dying.  Where do we go from here?
I'm not sure there are enough left who care.

I will try to be a better person, care a little more, love a little more.  Do what is right not what is convenient.
I won't do it for God or Jesus, I won't do it for the Dalai or the little fat Buddha statue.  I won't do it for me.  I will do it for that little baby.  That is something I can believe in.


Sun shines through my window
burning through the blinds
casting bars on the wall
hope is locked

The heart shivers,
wrapped in the warmth
Waiting for the sun to retreat,
and open its bars.

Hiding in the truth,
protecting its lies
And hiding in the lies
because of the truth.


-Bushman