If you want to increase your success rate, double your failure rate.

Friday, April 27, 2012

This Post Brought to you by the Letter X

The great letter X.  A roadblock in an otherwise average journey.  Stop the car, kids look at that thing!
You don't see it very often but when it's blocking your path it suddenly becomes insurmountable.  This can be considered one of the various forms of writers block.  I don't know the forms but I'm sure if I were to look this would be one.  Having a subject but unable to phoneticize it.  I mean really almost all words that begin with an X have a Z sound.  The only people to successfully alliterate the letter X have been the porn industry with their simple but straightforward XXX.  Not quite, Sally sells sea shells by the sea shore but you get the point much more clearly and there are no questions that follow XXX like, how much are your shells dear Sally?

I'm sure most of us have been on the X page of the various internet sites out there and I have discovered that there are three main links to the letter X.  Yellow, Wood and Dry.  Sounds like an Asian orgy, huh?

There is also a definition of my wife when she comes home from work to a pile of empty beer cans
Xanthippe.  Which is also tied to the above trifecta because my wood often goes dry on those days.
We could probably do a Kevin Bacon study on x words and the trifecta.    However in the interests of your attention span I'll get down to details.

Have I ever told you the story of the day I went to the hardware store for some garden hose repair kits?

It's quick and boring so hang tight, it'll be over soon.

I have a lot of garden hoses.  Right now I have 6.  At the time this story took place I had about ten.  I was watering, chickens, sheep, garden and the flower pots and beds.  I had hoses strung everywhere.  I mowed the grass a lot as well.  I like to mow and I also don't like to get off the mower once on it. Connect the dots and now you see why I was at the hardware store for a hose repair kit.
I picked up a chunk of hose, so I could match it up and get the right size kit, crammed it in my pocket and headed to the hardware.  Once there I pulled the hose from my pocket, found the correct size, and crammed the 8 inch chunk of hose back into my front pocket.  I headed to the checkout and placed my hose kit on the counter.

At the checkout was this new girl.  Perhaps a college student working hard to save for next years tuition and with her very attractive looks she could have made bigger money elsewhere.  It certainly would draw me back to the hardware store repetitive times this summer. (Stalker) I gave her my best smile, what can I say I'm a guy?  She smiled back, gave me a little head nod and looks at my shorts and says.........................
"Is that a xyloid in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"

(she actually said something else but damn people x is tough cut a guy some slack)

3 comments:

  1. Ok so I had to look up the word ::resembling wood : having the qualities or nature of wood : woody, ligneous:: very, very clever! I give two thumbs up on how Xtremely brilliant this is!

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  2. Wow, you narrowed down those three "X" related words, and packaged them up very neatly. Mine was of the yellow variety. X takes a lot of xtremely(to steal from the above quote) intense investigation Great job.
    Love the wood photo. I've seen that somewhere before, very cool.
    Kathy at Oak Lawn Images

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  3. 'X' is also the volume of the encyclopedia you take with you to read in the bathroom. Especially if you don't have much time.
    Or don't want your colon to fall into the bowl.

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